I made this for me.

I’m good at pretending

so I almost pretended

to myself

that I made it for you.

Or,

for youth

or for my future/family

or your future/family.

But, honestly, I lied.

It’s okay! I do that sometimes. It’s easier. smaller. directed towards the ground.

From what I’ve come to know and expect, eventually my body will stop me and say,

My body speaks in stains and I am slowly letting them sit on surfaces longer. I think I imagine that if I can sit with the stains, I’ll learn something about release. And, that release will let me heal. Will let me sweat truth to power. Will let me call forth the memories, inherited and chosen, that need to be touched.

No, in truth, this project is a “final attempt”

I hope

In this archive I honor lies.

truths..

stains

grieving (home).

farce.

performance. and, above all, the body.